synergy

Upbeat

It's been a stressful week for K and for me, but we've weathered it well. As I began to expect, K was more worried about not knowing with the job rather than worrying about the future once she found out. Basically, last week was hell due to uncertainty. Once she found out that she was to be placed in the developmental group, she's been okay.

I'll go into more detail, but the synopsis of the week is that K has realized that the reorganization at her office may have a very good outcome for her professionally and get her out of her rut. Also, she's feeling more optimistic about the future. [Now, you can skip all my lengthy descriptions, if you would like.]

K went to speak to her new manager this week. He was extremely impressed by her qualifications and he said his job is to find her a permanent position in the organization. Hence, this helped to counteract the negative feedback she received last week. He also recommended that she find a mentor and develop a individual development plan to plan for professional development. It's amazing how those little comments can make you feel worthwhile and wanted.

The other nice thing is that this guy immediately wanted K to come and work for him on a massive project that he's responsible for completing in two years. By today, we are both feeling less scared and I'm starting to think that this reorg might have a very positive outcome for K.

One interesting thing that I realized this week is how little K talks about her job. When I arrive home, I usually share with her things that happened throughout the day or frustrations with one of my projects. She will occasionally tell me about some conversation, but not much more. Well, this week that all changed. Upon arriving home, K began talking for 1.5 or 2 hours to tell me everything about her day and the conversations she had been having with her potentially new managers. It made me realize that she could be much happier and more engaged at the office than she has been. It appears as if there are three possible places for her to end up and it sounds like each one would be a good fit and she would receive support.

One thing holding K back has been her sick leave situation. She used 6 weeks of advanced sick leave while she was ill. She's been paying it back over time, but she's also continued to use it at times. Right now she still owes 3 weeks. Any case, she's been terrified that no one would take on someone with a negative leave balance. Her new manager took one look at it and asked what was the big deal that she had 3 weeks leave outstanding. It was a huge relief to her and took a burden of guilt off her shoulders.

K's done a great job of handling this, though she is pretty worn down today. I no longer have the sinking feeling and knot in my stomach, which were there much of last week. My anxiety immediately disappeared. I rarely feel anxious for myself, as I'm confident that I can handle anything that comes in my direction. But I frequently feel anxious for K. Example: Yesterday there were a few explosions outside her building. Turned out to be nothing and I wasn't worried about terrorism. Rather, I was worried that K would react badly. I was in an all-day meeting and couldn't contact her till noon (several hours after the incident.) I didn't change my behavior, but I was concerned. She was fine. Only thing that irritated her is that security wouldn't allow anyone to leave her building.

I'm trying to move away from worrying about her and believing that she'll be able to handle things. I'm getting better. But it's hard to let go, when I remember how helpless she was during her illness. Still, I'm making progress and trusting K's instincts.

We're off tomorrow for a wedding in the countryside. Should be a beautiful drive.

posted by synergy @ 6:59 AM