synergy

Denver

Okay, today started out really badly. I intended to blog about it, but I couldn't actually log in to Blogger this morning. So I was saved from myself. My day improved as it went on. Right now, I'm sitting in a hotel in Denver with my loan-a-fish, whom I have named Bertie. The hotel loans you a fish for your stay, if you request one. I've gone shopping, picked out a white suit for my 10 year college reunion, and have attended the hotel complimentary wine hour and chatted with other people. I'm obviously changing as I get older. A few years ago, I would have hid in my room and not even ventured out for complimentary wine. Needless to say, the only thing I missed out on was the complimentary shoulder and upper back massage during the wine hour, but I'll survive. If I had more time tomorrow, I would go to the hotel spa, but alas, I have to return home after my meeting.

K is doing better than she has been over the past couple of days. She vascilated between rage and depression and is constantly worried that she is no longer in bipolar remission. Actually, I believe she still is in remission and these mood swings are within the tolerance for normal/remission. That said, it still doesn't make it any easier on me.

This morning I was thinking that normal couples must get up in the morning and not be immediately challenged with rage and anger. I still believe that, but I'm feeling less sorry for myself than I did 14 hours ago. Urgh, 14 hours, I better head down and get some dinner.

K is continuing to struggle with the job situation. She's rightfully angry over it, but the anger has been preventing her from going to work and impeding her daily activities. I'm hoping that tomorrow she'll be able to go to work. Her original plan was to work from home, while I was out of town. However, the work in the basement has begun again, and they are stripping lead paint with acid. Needless to say, it isn't so pleasant to stay in the house right now.

I'm frustrated and angry with K's struggle. I'm ready for our life to be stable, and I occassionally wonder what I did in a previous life to have earned this one. But that isn't fair. I love K and she brings out traits in me, which otherwise would be buried. She brings out mhy personable and playful side. She refers to the old L as remote and distant.

Okay, turn down service is to arrive in 30 minutes. I need to head out and find myself some dinner.

posted by synergy @ 9:15 PM